"He's all over the place, a bit half-arsed" - Scott nails it about Arsenal's defence
Maybe not the words she would have chosen, but correct nonetheless.
Arsenal went into Sunday's Premier League match away to title challengers Manchester City knowing that they would need to be at their very best defensively to get anything from the game.
Given the level of attacking talent at the disposal of Pep Guardiola, Unai Emery's side would have arrived at the Etihad Stadium fully aware that the margin of error would have been tiny if they were to come away with the result they wanted.
Technical excellence, tactical discipline, concentration, hard work and composure were what would be required from Arsenal's defence, but unfortunately each was in short supply.
From the first minute, Arsenal's back line resembled a group of people who had never met, didn't speak the same language and had never seen a football.
This was evidenced by the Arsenal positioning for City's first goal - through Sergio Aguero in the 49th second of the match - as centre-back and World Cup winner Shkodran Mustafi decided to just do his own thing and stand a full six yards closer to his goal than the nearest City player.
This photograph of Mustafi's position for City's first goal might be one of the funniest things I've ever seen. pic.twitter.com/fc5Ahw3Ybz
— FootballJOE (@FootballJOE) February 3, 2019
Perhaps the most damning thing is that this wasn't even the worst piece of Arsenal defending all night, as time and again the likes of Mustafi and Stephan Lichsteiner betrayed their experience by behaving like headless chickens in a match their side went on to lose 3-1.
This was something touched upon by pundit Alex Scott during Sky Sports coverage of the match.
Discussing Lichsteiner, Scott says "he's all over the place. He doesn't know when to go and close down his player. He's leaving... a bit half-arsed and that's why between him and (Alex) Iwobi they're getting popped around down this side".
“Half-arsed” 😂👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 pic.twitter.com/0oSFVXNpqq
— Jay (@RFFH) February 3, 2019
There were quite a few laughs online at Scott's choice of words, particularly because of just how apt they were. Arsenal were a total shit show and if anything Scott's words were a touch too generous.
— Sky Sports Premier League (@SkySportsPL) February 3, 2019