The 54 people you'll find in every single Irish gym 4 years ago

The 54 people you'll find in every single Irish gym

1. The talker

2 Talker

2 Talker 2

2. The barefoot guy

Because only a fool would do a deadlift with their shoes and socks on.

3. The sleazy gym instructor

7 Sleazy Gym Instructor

4. The screamer

5. The weight slammer

6. The GAA guy

7. The guy who used to play GAA

Dragging himself away from an afternoon carryout to stick on the old county minor jersey with number 11 at the back to sit on the bike and talk about tonight's antics.

8. The poser

The sort of guy who takes his top off at a concert when it's raining because he hasn't worked all year not to show all of this off.

An Alternative Look At The Melbourne Bodybuilding Championships

9. The guy who tells you you're doing it wrong

10 1

10 2

10. The technique freak

11. The guy wearing tights


12. The hot girl everyone is staring at


13. The soccer guy

Flat out.


14. The guy who does one rep for Instagram

Yeah, yeah, you're telling us you've just killed six reps at 150kg but why are you only showing us one?

15. The guy trying to take a picture of himself in the mirror

We all need evidence that we were at the gym.


16. The counting exhaler

Because everyone should hear how many reps you're doing.

17. The guy who discovers a punch bag and now thinks he's a lethal weapon


18. The guys who are suddenly MMA experts

19. The shadow boxer soul searching at the mirror


20. The gym instructor just hanging around to talk to people

... and to let people know he's a gym instructor, of course.


21. The equipment junkie

How can you expect to lift things without the right look? A footballer couldn't play football without... shin pads.


22. The guy who struts around after every set

You've marked your territory, but your territory needs to be bigger.

23. The guy who changes the music

You are the only person in the world.

24. The girl who's best friends with the gym instructors

Nothing else matters anymore.


25. The greatest spotter in the history of spotting

26. The guys who are making friends

Oh, friends.


27. The guy absolutely pelting uphill on the treadmill

There's just not enough space in the outside world.

28. The guy who thinks he's living in 8 Mile


29. The guy who stares at everyone

Time between sets can be a long ol' jaunt. Some people use it to prowl, some people use it to look at themselves and some losers use it to recover. Others, they use it to stare at every single person daring to move in their vicinity. The guy doing pull-ups will never get off lightly from the death stare.

30. The guy who doesn't need to be there

31. The singer

Please. Don't be that guy.

32. The guy who's permanently ready for a fight

He's at war with weights. What he's doing is more important than you.


33. The guy who knows an instructor

And it's his job to make everyone in the world know that he knows. He'll be found at one side of the gym shouting across countless people to the other side something shit like, "No pump today, Matt? You're good to yourself!" Because that just couldn't wait.

34. The skipping guy in everyone's way


35. The guys who trust no-one

Will be found lugging around their kit bags from machine to machine.

36. The guy lifting too much always asking for a spot

37. The lingerer


38. The social guys

The gym's better when you're not sweating. Also found in the form of a group of girls stretching.

Social guys

39. The improvisers

It would be too embarrassing to have to read the instructions or ask someone, so make up your own exercise and pretend like this was all part of the plan.

40. The guy who sees more than just a pull-up bar


41. The guy with food

There was just no time to consume this before or after the gym. It's now or never.


The same guy will generally find time to post an after-gym meal picture on all social media platforms. #Gains #Bulk #GoHardOrGoHome

42. The 6.30 club

"Okay, lads, let's get to work."

*Everyone reaches for camera phone to tell the world that they are up an hour earlier today.*


43. The MMA bully

44. The texter


45. The guy filling his water holding the show up


46. The injured guy constantly doing rehab


47. The guy with a piece of string for a vest

Showing your pecs just isn't enough if your nipples are not visible.

48. The bluffer


49. The rugby guys

They lift more than you.

50. The guy who changes the weight before he leaves a station


51. The guy pulling a sex face


52. The guys heading out tonight looking for a pump


53. The entourage

Because you couldn't lift a weight without six people screaming at you to do so.

54. The 'I'm using that' guy

Very special thanks to Bogdan Merkes of for the use of his top conditioning facilities and, of course, to Darragh Murphy for his splendid acting skills.