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Published 16:48 30 Jan 2015 GMT
Updated 17:00 30 Jan 2015 GMT
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2. Die hard fans complain about the fact only die hard fans go to the League
3. The GAA will say crowds are up - the evidence suggests otherwise
4. Joe Brolly will find something to moan about, 'The quality of toilet paper at county grounds is just a scandal - it would tear the arse off you'
5. Chaos as fans are surprised that you have to buy tickets for the league as well as championship games
6. New jerseys recieved as Christmas gifts get a first airing in the terraces, over at least six jumpers, a hoodie and a thermal vest
7. Newspapers will try and find some way of making a clash at the bottom of Division Four between Carlow and London sound exciting and a must see
8. GAA players use earmuffs to block out all talk of Championship
9 Michael Lyster will do a John Motson impression with a huge furry coat for a day out in Castlebar
10 Someone will complain that the sliotars are under-inflated #sliotargate
11 Someone will complain the sliotars are over-inflated #sliotargate2
12 At least three players on the panel for the League are only there to pick up the gear and will split for America as soon as it is over
13. Jim McGuinness will be pictured in disguise at a Donegal match
14. After a match a player will tweet that a referee should wear glasses. He'll get banned for 48 weeks before a 12-year appeal process finally sees it reduced to 24 weeks
15. MMA fan Kieran McGeeney will name Conor McGregor as the new strength/conditioning/fighting coach to the Armagh footballers
16. Davy Fitzgerald will claim everyone is against him and Clare
17. UK hurling and football fans won't understand why NHL isn't on ice

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