Papiss Cisse goes full Helen Lovejoy in his apology for spitting incident

FA charge both players over alleged spitting incident

As we have already explored today, the place of spitting at the very top of football's taboo list remains untouched. The reaction to Jonny Evans and Papiss Cisse's unexpected bout of expectorate last night has rumble on into today, with talk of six-game bans for both players. At the very least they will have to explain themselves to the FA after they were charged with spitting (that's a real charge). This is despite both players issuing separate and contrasting statements this afternoon. Evans was out of the blocks first with his 'What? Spitting? No, not me' effort. "Having woken up this morning I am shocked to have seen the media coverage from last night’s match. I would like to make it clear that I did not spit at Papiss Cisse. "I was totally unaware of any spitting incident and had assumed that the issue at the time was with the challenge and his attempted retaliation to the tackle from the floor. During the game Papiss Cisse and I spoke about the incident and it is clear by my reaction in the television footage that I was totally surprised by any suggestion of spitting. "It is not in my character or in my nature to spit at anybody nor is it something I have ever done or would ever do. It is certainly not something that I did last night." About 30 minutes later, the Newcastle man released his statement, where, among other things, he expressed grave concern for the young people of the world. “I have apologies to make to a lot of people today. Firstly to my teammates and to our supporters, secondly to Jonny Evans, and thirdly to every football fan who saw the incident between myself and Jonny. “I reacted to something I found very unpleasant. Sometimes it is hard not to react, particularly in the heat of the moment. I have always tried hard to be positive a role model, especially for our young fans, and yesterday I let you down. “I hope children out there playing football for their clubs and schools this weekend will know better than to retaliate when they are angry. Perhaps when they see the problem it now causes me and my team they will be able to learn from my mistake, not copy it.” All very noble, but more than a hint of a certain Simpsons character if you ask us...