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PICS: If you don’t want to feel worse about your life, don’t look at Wilfried Zaha’s new mansion

Published 15:05 15 Oct 2015 BST

Updated 19:19 15 Oct 2015 BST

Conan Doherty
PICS: If you don’t want to feel worse about your life, don’t look at Wilfried Zaha’s new mansion

Homefootball

Who ever invented the term 'how the other half live'?

Because if half the world are living like this, we need to get some new friends. Wilfried Zaha has just bought a new seven-bedroom London mansion and it's damn right beautiful. The Crystal Palace attacker has shelled out £2.5m to move into former club owner Ron Noades' house which featured in Footballers' Wives - that TV show where everyone just ran around jumping into bed with everyone else's other halves. Water slide, cinema room, all the stuff you don't really need in a house but, God, you'd take it if you were given half a chance. Check out the pictures from Surrey Homes/RightMove. Looks alright from the outside. 2D6E166E00000578-3273081-image-m-21_1444894063408 Every sofa should be a bed as well. 2D6E168900000578-3273081-image-m-24_1444894631801 Every bath tub should require a stepladder entry. TUB Every house pool should have a water slide. POOL1 Decent enough kitchen. 2D6E15E500000578-3273081-Luxury_kitchen_The_food_preparation_area_features_an_eclectic_ra-m-32_1444898143761 Every kitchen should have an extra kitchen looking into a pool. 2D6E15EC00000578-3273081-image-m-18_1444893789247 And sure what would a fireplace be if it wasn't bigger than you? 2D6E15DF00000578-3273081-A_living_room_in_the_house_contains_a_sylish_wood_burner_picture-m-15_1444893729240 It's nice to see how the other 0.0000001 per cent live.

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PICS: If you don't want to feel worse about your life, don't look at Wilfried Zaha's new mansion