SportsJOE.ie

First things first, let's think about the weather. Which of these conditions do you prefer?

Sunshine, nearly all year round

Binning it down, nearly all year round

Cold, sometimes even snowy. I'm Norwegian, I can handle it.

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From which of these iconic midfielders would you most like to receive a pass?

Scholes

Zidane

Ronaldinho

David Batty

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To what extent does playing Champions League football every year matter to you?

It's everything. I have to play Champions League

The occasional run in the Europa League would be quite nice.

I prefer mid-table mediocrity and the occasional relegation scrap.

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Would you describe yourself as someone who is easily disappointed?

Not really. I take each day as it comes.

Yes. When you set high expectations for yourself, this is part of life.

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Which of these music acts are you most likely to listen to?

Oasis

Kaiser Chiefs

Simply Red (Ask your dad)

Julio Igelsias

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To what extent would a calculated attempt to snap your dad's leg in half influence your choice of next club?

Not one bit. The past is the past and this is my career, not my dad's.

I could never betray my father

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Are you the kind of person who is open to trying new things, or do you stick to what you're good at?

I'm open to trying new things

I stick with what I know I'm good at

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How do you like your club owners?

Charismatic businessmen

Parasitic Americans

Rulers of wealthy states with questionable human rights records

Russian billionaires with big yachts and Guus Hiddink on speed-dial

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As a prolific goalscorer, which of these legendary strikers do you most admire?

Van Nistelrooy

Ronaldo

Del Piero

Goater

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What's more important to you in life?

Making more money than I, or the next three generations of my family, could ever spend

Being regarded a success by my peers

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What do you think of this man's choice of career path?

Treacherous

I admire it. Real winners put club loyalties aside.

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What kind of manager do you most enjoy playing for?

One with an obsessive eye for detail

A manager who sometimes prioritises results over style

Someone who's mates with my dad and used to coach me before

One I'll not get attached to as they'll likely be sacked in 6 months

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